For a few hours, I was an animal. A beast. A domesticated pet turned wild. All control – no longer mine. I was no longer fit to survive. Without the help of my caretakers, I was helpless. Mumbling words. Blind to every movement that wasn’t the stumbling motion of my body. I felt things, heard things, but all understanding was gone. I was the dog returning to its vomit. All human sensation was dead.
Sleep came easily enough, but when upon awaking, I was surrounded by disaster. The uncontrolled, unnatural occurrences of the night were suddenly like needles pressing in all sides. I had a soul. After all, I am a human.
And I will never dehumanize myself again.